Sunday Fun – Caption Contest

Caption time! This time from the recently displayed Metroid: Other M.

Game Art of the Week – Snapshots of a world (of warcraft)

I love World of Warcraft, as you may have noticed, and I’m currently enjoying the world one last time before it is destroyed forever so I’m making sure I don’t miss anything, in other words I’m hitting screenshot a lot.

And what a beautiful world it can be, still five years down the line the environmental effects add a lot to a world suffering from a low polygon count and it’s almost a shame the world is getting destroyed as I’m still noticing little touches, one of which I want to share with you today.

This picture is quite poignant of Blizzard’s attention to detail, but first some lore for the uninformed. The classic world of Azaroth is split into three continents, Kalimdor, Northrend, and the Eastern Kingdoms. Northrend is a place full of big evil things including the Lich King, the Eastern Kingdoms is where the Humans call home, and Kalimdor is where Thrall established the Horde at the beginning of Warcraft 3 and this picture is from a zone called Thousand Needles in Kalimdor.

What I love about this picture is the way in which the Night Elf style of signpost has been kicked askew, weeds growing showing that it’s not been tended to, and yet it still points to the only nearby Alliance point of interest. Meanwhile the new Horde signpost stands firm, pointing to all of the Horde’s new outposts and camps, with the sign stood clean and perfect almost mocking the disheveled Elven marker. Beautiful.

This is just a picture I really like. Enjoy.

Dala’s Deadly Tips: How to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum

So you picked up Duke Nukem 3D on live arcade last week and want some quick tips as to getting those multiplayer achievements before everyone realizes the multiplayer is actually quite rubbish? Well now that I’ve secured the accolades for myself I thought I’d pass on my ‘pro’ tips so that you too can enhance your e-penis whilst spouting badass one liners.

How to Kick Ass

Activate cheat mode.

The first thing you’ll want to do is journey into the options so, pause the game and select ‘Help and Options’, then ‘Settings’, then ‘Gameplay Options’ and now turn on ‘Auto Aim’, this is your first step towards victory.

With Auto Aim enabled simply pointing your reticule in the vague area of your opponent your bullets will seek them like a fat child to his Friday pastry, you will automatically hit enemies above you as well, Doom style.

Know the weapons.

Well, know what weapons to use at least. With cheat mode activated the best weapons to use are actually the pistol, shotgun, and ripper. The Rocket Launcher is effective as well, if you can trap your opponent, however your new bees to nectar like bullets mean the more traditional bullet sprayers are your best option.

Guns to avoid include the inaccurate Shrink Ray, unpredictable Pipe Bombs, and those rubbish Devastators, that’s not to say don’t use them it’s just a case of other guns being better.

There's a ripper behind the screen, but first you'll need to activate the projector.

Know locations of key items.

A little personal recon can go a long way, learning the location of the following items will help towards victory;

– Jet Pack – Many levels have some tasty tools hidden up high, and it’s always a confusing place to attack from.

– First Aid Kit – Talking about the gadget here, jamming B at the last second to keep yourself alive is worth it. You can’t kill if you’re dead.

– Shotgun – Arguably the best weapon in the game with cheat mode active.

– Health/Atomic Health – These beauties can keep you fighting, nothing worse than losing all your shotgun ammo and that beautiful camping spot.

Individual level tips

Some levels are easier to get kills in than others, here are a few tips for the better levels;

L.A. Rumble

Also to be known as air domination, there is a jet pack hidden down the side street, through the door by the woman, and in the ‘cubicle’ in this room on the desk. Activate the jetpack and you can grab some atomic health off the lip by the red winking lady, a rocket from the top of the main building, a med kit, ammo, and further ammo on the lip lower down and opposite the building. Proceed to rain pain upon your enemies; the favourite place to fight is in the large square in front of winky lady so you’re guaranteed to secure plenty of cheeky kills.

Hollywood Hollocaust

The snack bar will be your friend here, hop over and head through the door to the left end (when facing outwards) in here you’ll find a shotgun and some health, a secret cubby to the other side should have opened as well, grab the atomic health here. Players can’t help but fight here, it’s a focal point of the level, and thanks to your bountiful supply of shotgun ammo and health top-ups you should do just fine.

Spin Cycle

You want to be ducking into the alcoves as these contain rippers and shotguns, and if you activate the alien looking buttons in the alcoves of the alcoves (Xbiskit) you can grab health kits and atomic health. To secure the kills just check to the left for people riding the spin then hold the trigger, ride round to the next alcove, rinse and repeat.

Stadium

Not necessarily a good level this, but an easy one for kills. Turn towards enemies, hold trigger, cross fingers. For additional weapons jump up at an edge, the Ripper and Shotgun are your best bet, grab one then circle around the upper layer firing in the general direction of your opponents. You will die a lot in Stadium, but cheat mode means you’ll get plenty of kills as well.

Spray and Pray...

In conclusion you should be able to average twenty kills every five minutes if you’re good enough, and you don’t keep landing in four player games, so good luck in your efforts to kick ass!

How to Chew Bubble Gum

Head to local supplier of gum, peruse selection of Hubba Bubba, select preferred flavour (Cherry), and purchase with hard earned or stolen money. Unwrap individual tablet of gum, place in mouth and start to chew slowly and savour the initially rich flavour. Attempt to blow bubbles by stretching the gum out over your tongue and blowing into the thin sheet with your mouth curled into your best chimpanzee impression. After several failures resort to chewing rhythmically on the gum until its lack of flavour starts to irritate you, at which point you should introduce the now disfigured ‘gum’ to a bin or, preferably, the underside of some school equipment.

How to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum

So you picked up Duke Nukem 3D on live arcade last week and want some quick tips as to getting those multiplayer achievements before everyone realizes the multiplayer is actually quite rubbish? Well now that I’ve secured the accolades myself I thought I’d pass on my ‘pro’ tips so that you too can enhance your e-penis.

How to Kick Ass

-Activate cheat mode.

The first thing you’ll want to do is journey into the options so, pause the game and select ‘Help and Options’, then ‘Gameplay Options’ and now turn on ‘Auto Aim’, this is your first step towards victory.

With Auto Aim enabled simply pointing your reticule in the vague area of your opponent your bullets will seek them like a fat child to his Friday pastry, you will automatically hit enemies above you as well, Doom style.

-Know the weapons.

Well, know what weapons to use at least. With cheat mode activated the best weapons to use are actually the pistol, shotgun, and ripper. The Rocket Launcher is effective as well, if you can trap your opponent, however your new bees to nectar like bullets mean the more traditional bullet sprayers are your best option.

Guns to avoid include the inaccurate Shrink Ray, unpredictable Pipe Bombs, and those rubbish Devastators, that’s not to say don’t use them it’s just a case of other guns being better.

Know locations.

A little personal recon can go a long way, learning the location of the following items will help towards victory;

– Jet Pack – Many levels have some tasty tools hidden up high, and it’s always a confusing place to attack from.

– First Aid Kit – Talking about the gadget here, jamming B at the last second to keep yourself alive is worth it. You can’t kill if you’re dead.

– Shotgun – Arguably the best weapon in the game with cheat mode active.

– Health/Atomic Health – These beauties can keep you fighting, nothing worse than losing all your shotgun ammo and that beautiful camping spot.

Individual level tips

Some levels are easier to get kills in than others, here are a few tips for the better levels;

L.A. Rumble

Also to be known as air domination, there is a jet pack hidden down the side street, through the door by the woman, and in the ‘cubicle’ in this room on the desk. Activate the jetpack and you can grab some atomic health off the lip by the red winking lady, a rocket from the top of the main building, a med kit, ammo, and further ammo on the lip lower down and opposite the building. Proceed to rain pain upon your enemies; the favourite place to fight is in the large square in front of winky lady so you’re guaranteed to secure plenty of cheeky kills.

Hollywood Hollocaust

The snack bar will be your friend here, hop over and head through the door to the left end (when facing outwards) in here you’ll find a shotgun and some health, a secret cubby to the other side should have opened as well, grab the atomic health here. Players can’t help but fight here, it’s a focal point of the level, and thanks to your bountiful supply of shotgun ammo and health top-ups you should do just fine.

Spin Cycle

You want to be ducking into the alcoves as these contain rippers and shotguns, and if you activate the alien looking buttons in the alcoves of the alcoves (Xbiskit) you can grab health kits and atomic health. To secure the kills just check to the left for people riding the spin then hold the trigger, ride round to the next alcove, rinse and repeat.

Stadium

Not necessarily a good level this, but an easy one for kills. Turn towards enemies, hold trigger, cross fingers. For additional weapons jump up at an edge, the Ripper and Shotgun are your best bet, grab one then circle around the upper layer firing in the general direction of your opponents. You will die a lot in Stadium, but cheat mode means you’ll get plenty of kills as well.

In conclusion you should be able to average twenty kills every five minutes if you’re good enough, and you don’t keep landing in four player games, so good luck in your efforts to kick ass!

How to Chew Bubble Gum

Head to local supplier of gum, peruse selection of Hubba Bubba, select preferred flavour (Cherry), and purchase with hard earned or stolen money. Unwrap individual tablet of gum, place in mouth and start to chew slowly and savour the initially rich flavour. Attempt to blow bubbles by stretching the gum out over your tongue and blowing into the thin sheet with your mouth curled into your best chimpanzee impression. After several failures resort to chewing rhythmically on the gum until its lack of flavour starts to irritate you, at which point you should introduce the now disfigured ‘gum’ to a bin or, preferably, the underside of some school equipment.

Yabba Dabba Doo! The Flintstones vehicle made for Bear & Bird.

Banjo’s Flintstone’s vehicle construction challenge

Banjo has been thinking about his past and realized he wants to see how Terry is doing back in Terrydacyland and decided he wanted a vehicle that would be appropriate, therefore this week’s challenge was to re-create the Flintstone’s iconic methos of transport in Nuts and Bolt’s vehicle editor!

As with before, peruse the entries and then vote for the three you think most accurately replicate the family friendly vehicle of this prehistoric icon.

Ah memories, just how is Terry nowadays?

Here’s the classic intro to check out the images to –

Bandwagon

StayDead

Roonmastor

Silly Banjo, that’s a tree not a steak.

T9Flake

Note: Can be pushed to move from here. Oh and Gazoo made it so it could float. Apparently.

Dalagonash

Note: Can be pushed to move.

JK

Note: Rollers actually work and can be pushed from here and move.

And to conclude your viewing appropriately, the outro.

So yes, click on the poll and we’ll see you on Friday for another Replica challenge! Thanks to everyone who took part.

If anyone who took part feels that my pictures do not do your creation justice, feel free to take your own and pm me the link, I’ll happily add it to your pictures.

If you want to vote in the poll, well, you’ll just have to shimmy on over to GRcade won’t you! Right over here.

Video of the Week – Mario Galaxy 2 is AMAZING.

Scale seems to be the name of the game, well no Mario Galaxy 2 is the name of the game but scale seems to be the key improvement.

Huge obstacles, huge enemies, huge planets, everything that was great about Mario Galaxy has been super sized or expanded, and the creativity doesn’t stop there; platforming up a cylinder shaped 2D plane? Brilliant. Add Yoshi to this expanded mix and you’ve got a recipe for absolutely sublime gaming.

Review – Bioshock 2

Available on: Xbox 360, PC, PS3

Version Reviewed: PC

2K Marin have also done the PS3 version of Bioshock.

A great scholar once said, “Right here on the ocean floor, Such wonderful things surround you, What more is you lookin’ for?” What more indeed, many people will come to Bioshock 2 launching criticism like a juiced up splicer hurling bees, ‘Rapture doesn’t feel new’ they’ll scream, ‘I’m not squashing people under my size thirteen’s’ others will moan, ‘Buying this game didn’t get Sarah to notice me at lunchtime’ Timothy from Massachusetts will strangely allege.

Final absurd point aside these ‘complaints’ aren’t without reason, but did you expect Rapture to feel all that new? An invitation back to one of modern entertainments more interesting locales should be embraced not dismissed as for all its similarities the team at 2K Marin have re-created and expanded Rapture beautifully without losing any of its unique charms, What more is you lookin’ for?

Daddy Issues

Filling the oversized boots of Prototype Big Daddy ‘Delta’ the game’s opening sees you rudely separated from your Little Sister companion by the game’s villainous figure, Sophia Lamb. It turns out that Lamb was one of Andrew Ryan’s main figures of opposition and a key figure in the downfall of Rapture, an addition that may irk some fans however Lamb’s morally ambiguous objectives and soulless delivery create a character that only serves to foster questions throughout the game as you struggle to reclaim the sister she took from you, moulding a story that manages to holds its own against the first game’s Pulitzer Prize quality scribe.

Rapture is in an even worse state than the previous game.

Progression through the game is linear to a degree, you’re free to explore each individual area though roughly until you decide to progress the plot, which is for all intents and purposes the same system as the first game. This new system works to the game’s advantage however, walls will come crashing down on your face, forcing you to plod along the sea bed to a new area or you’ll have to fight your way out of a flood that threatens to seal you in a watery grave, the frequency and impact of setpieces has been turned up to eleven.

The Gameplay has also been improved greatly through the simple addition of dual wielding a gun and plasmid power at once, no longer must you sacrifice playing around with telekinesis for the sake of having a firearm at the ready. The weapons unfortunately feel like Big Daddy ‘versions’ of standard armaments and many of the plasmids are returning favourites however a few of the late additions to your arsenal are well worth waiting for.

Aside from you being able to shoot better, those that want to plug some bullets in you tend to come in a larger array of flavours, normal and Houdini (invisible) splicer opponents return alongside the hulking Big Daddies but they are accompanied by the unwieldy Brute who will happily throw the nearest heavy object your way, and the frightfully nimble and screamy Big Sister who will act unkindly to anyone who tampers with the Little Sisters roaming a level, these fights alone are worth the entry fee.

n'yaw, innit cute?

It’s not all praise however, the initial hours will feel like a re-tread of Bioshock; plasmid introduction and progression will cause Déjà vu moments a-plenty for all but the most forgetful of players and Little Sister protection can become an exercise in monotony. That said the game only manages to improve itself throughout with the final hours offering an arguably better experience than anything in Bioshock, you can live in confidence that while the first game peaked early the second is always accelerating to its nuclear explosion of a final act.

Under the Sea

It’s plot isn’t as intelligent as Bioshock, and the location won’t re-introduce your jaw to the floor like it’s 2007 again, but as a return to Rapture it improves itself as a video game; your moral decisions have a larger impact, the tweaks to gameplay make it simply more fun to play, and having more nooks and crannies than a Parisian back street means the investigative player will double, perhaps even triple their playtime over a straight six hour run.

Add to this brilliantly realised single player a surprisingly interesting and unique multiplayer, plasmid powers and tight interior fighting helps it stand out from the modern warfare seen elsewhere, and 2K Marin have created a more complete package than the first game offered. It’s not the bravest of sequels to come out recently but, as that great scholar once said, “Darling it’s better, Down where it’s wetter, Take it from me.”

9

For your consideration – Download-tastic! 2K have already announced an incoming multiplayer expansion that sounds a touch dubious but there is single player content promised, and with Delta’s story all but done here’s looking forward to some interesting ‘episodes’ in Rapture’s future.

Announcing the Announcement of a Post About Announcements

Capcom recently dropped this nugget that they’ll be announcing a huuuuuuge surprise sometime in April, just like when they said they’d announce a game everyone wanted and it turned out as the sequel to heat collecting, insect squishing, mech infested ‘We’re on a freezing planet but the female character’s cleavage is perfectly on show’ shat-o-shooter Lost Planet. Excuse me if I don’t get my hopes up.

Cold? Pah, students won't let a little nature ruin their commitment to fashion.

Announcing upcoming announcements is becoming a growing trend and it’s always infuriating, not least because the wait is annoying, but mainly because everyone who puts their theories forward has far better ideas than what the company actually comes out with.

Marvel vs Capcom 3 cry some, new Viewtiful Joe 3 cry others, a reboot of Dino Crisis say the most delusional. And you know what? Whatever they announce won’t be half as good as the best suggestions, probably because the best ideas would sell all of fifteen copies .

Announcing your announcement drums up attention for your announcement of course but what about just walking out into the Internet one day and showing off Okami 2 to an unsuspecting Internet? Nintendo did it a few weeks ago with The Last Story and Xenoblade and the dogs of the Internet cocked their ears and listened with a smile on their faces, a mildly pleasant surprise puts you in better light than failing to announce Devil May Cry 5 guest starring Bayonetta to an audience who’ve managed to hype themselves up for it.

The only thing announcing your announcement achieves is disappointment.

However if it is Street Fighter 3: Third Strike HD Remix then all is forgiven.

Love you Capcom.

-Dala ❤

Capcom recently dropped this nugget, that they’ll be announcing a huuuuuuge surprise early next month, just like when you said you’d announce a game everyone wanted and it turned out as the sequel to heat collecting, insect squishing, mech infested ‘We’re on a freezing planet but the female character’s cleavage is perfectly on show’ shat-o-shooter Lost Planet? Excuse me if I don’t get my hopes up.

Announcing upcoming announcements is becoming a growing trend and it’s always infuriating, not least because the wait is annoying, but mainly because everyone who puts their theories forward has far better ideas than what the company actually comes out with.

Marvel vs Capcom 3 cry some, new Viewtiful Joe 3 cry others, a reboot of Dino Crisis say the most delusional. And you know what? Whatever they announce won’t be half as good as the best suggestions, probably because the best ideas would sell all of fifteen copies .

Announcing your announcement drums up attention for your announcement of course but what about just walking out into the Internet one day and showing off Okami 2 to an unsuspecting Internet? Nintendo did it a few weeks ago with The Last Story and Xenoblade and the dogs of the Internet cocked their ears and listened with a smile on their faces, a mildly pleasant surprise puts you in better light than failing to announce Devil May Cry 5 guest starring Bayonetta to an audience who’ve managed to hype themselves up for it.

The only thing announcing your announcement achieves is disappointment.

However if it is Street Fighter 3: Third Strike HD Remix then all is forgiven.

Love you Capcom.

-Dala ❤

Sunday Fun – Caption contest.

Ok this is more an excuse to post another image of the gorgeous Halo: Reach, but whatever. Make it funny!

Video Game Music Videos that are actually good!

Wow that’s a long title. Anyway, I’ve spent too much of today pouring over New Super Mario Bros Wii’s marketing strategy and loads of gubbins about Glocal, yes ‘glocal’, markets. So here are some pretty good video game music videos robbed from GRcade’s Game of the Decade thread of the four finalists!

Either of them would have an argument as the winner, and it will be interesting to see the forum explode at the eventual conclusion, it’s been one hell of a journey. Thanks Skippy.

Game art of the week – Bayonetta by abraibarnabas

There’s plenty of bland Bayonetta fanart out there, there’s also plenty of bizarre raunchy stuff out there, but the common theme is that they don’t necessarily understand the character.

However, Abraibarnabas (what a name) actually has managed something that captures the obscure beauty of Bayonetta in his own way.

A brilliant piece of art, his angular style manages to capture Bayonetta’s unique look with a great sense of flair that many artists dare not try, the splash of red over the greyscale of the picture may be a tried and true technique but any player of Bayonetta will be able to tell you that the flowing tassels are as much a part of the character as her spontaneous nudity.

And as a bonus, STORMTROOPERS!